I Just Want To Die
by Psychedelic Dust Bunny
Summary: Naruto has been hated all his life and has been given many death threats by Konoha citizens. One day he just gives up and gives into thier wishes. He will take his own life. R&R. Better than it sounds... KakaXNaru
1. Jinchuuriki Don't Deserve to Live

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.**

**AN: Wow this story is such a contrast to my other one. LOL. It's so dark. I haven't written a dark story before…**

**Oh! Guess what?**

**Cheese Toast!**

**Don't ask okay… Just don't ask….**

Naruto stood in an open meadow. A kunai held firmly in his grasp. His knuckles went white from the pressure he was applying. He wanted to die. It was the one thing he wanted ever since he became a Chuunin. When he finally became one he was treated more poorly and some people started to through kunai and shuriken at him. Causing him massive injuries, almost resulting in his death every single time.

The birds were chirping loudly in the willow and birch trees, and the sun was shining brightly today. Not a single cloud floated in the sky. Normally today would have been a happy day, a day when children go outside to play or bake freshly baked goods with their parents. That is, if they had any. Naruto slowly raised the Kunai. Jinchuuriki's were hated. Their fate was set in stone.

Hearing footsteps against the hard ground not to far away from him, Naruto looked up. The kunai was now almost level with his heart. The blade shined in the sunlight. Almost blinding anyone who looked at the black blade. It must be nice to be an inanimate object. Having no feelings…

In front of him Kakashi was grief stricken. Another one of his precious people was to die in front of him? Naruto was always so happy. Was that just a mask he used to hide his true pain? His loneliness? He looked down to Sakura, who was probably filled with joy; maybe Naruto was finally going to die, before looking up again. She really was heartless wasn't she? She didn't care for Naruto after Sasuke died. She had wanted him dead. Well now at least her wish was coming true.

Sakura just stared at him indifferently; she could care less to what happened to Naruto. If he died then maybe she could be happy once more. Sasuke was long since dead. Orochimaru had taken his body as his new vessel. Achieving in attaining the Sharingan or otherwise known as the mirror wheel eye. That's why she hated Naruto's very existence. He just probably just let Sasuke go to Orochimaru.

Kakashi screamed. He couldn't take this anymore. Why was Naruto doing this? "Naruto! Don't do it!"

A tear trickled down Naruto's cheek, land on the ground with a soft thud. He looked back down to the kunai now level with his heart, before looking up again. Sky blue eyes locked onto smoky grey ones.

"Why Kakashi-sensei? No one cares about me. I'm just a Jinchuuriki. Jinchuuriki shouldn't be allowed to live, right Kakashi-sensei? People think I shouldn't even exist, and I think it's true I don't have the right. I don't have the right to exist like you. I never did."

The kunai nicked his chest causing a stream of blood to go slide down his chest. The Kyuubi wasn't going to heal him. He had forced the Kyuubi into letting him die. It was his wish after all. Maybe once he wanted once he wanted to be Hokage, to have the villagers respect him, but not anymore. He had realized that dream was an impossible one. A horribly impossible dream.

Kakashi took a step forward; he was prepared to stop Naruto at even the cost of his own life. Naruto had been so happy when he made it to Jounin status. Maybe that was the only time he had actually been happy… But then Rookie nine had to ruin it for him. Calling him a demon brat and throwing broken glass bottles and other things trying to kill him on the spot. Rookie nine had found out Naruto was the jailer for the Kyuubi that day, and they weren't going to let Naruto get away with it. All of them except Hyuuga Hinata and Hyuuga Neji wanted payback for what the Kyuubi had done. Kill the boy and the Kyuubi dies too right?

Kakashi started to cry. He hadn't cried since his sensei died, and that was many years ago… In barely an audible whisper Kakashi dared to speak again, "Naruto think of all the people who are going to miss you…"

There was silence. Naruto pushed the kunai harder. Shocking pain coursed through his veins. "What? You mean you, Iruka, Jiraiya and Tsunade?"

Kakashi stared in disbelieve, they were the only ones who cared about him? "What about becoming Hokage Naruto? Don't you care about that anymore?"

Sakura smirked before Naruto could reply; "Naruto will never make it to Hokage Kakashi-sensei. He's the demon in human form. Demons don't deserve to be Hokage. He only wanted that position to gain power. All he wants to do is destroy the village. To finish what he started." Sakura turned her back against Naruto and walked away.

"I'm sorry Kakashi-sensei, but she's right, I'll never become Hokage. I'm just a demon boy."

Kakashi felt rage build up in him. He believed in that crap!? He was defiantly NOT the demon! Demons were heartless creatures, Naruto was not heartless, he cared about a lot of things… Didn't he? Clenching his hands Kakashi, took another step forward.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." Blood pooled on the ground beneath Naruto, turning the grass crimson. Naruto felt anger towards Konoha, he always had. He only said he would protect it and love it because of the few precious people he had there. He was doing most the villagers a favour my killing himself.

Naruto tilted his head his head to the side. The now blood red kunai was dangerously close to his heart. He could feel the instant loss of much needed blood, oxygen, and even chakra. "I'm surprised you're not happy that I'm going to die at last. Nobody has been able to kill me so far… but now I'm taking my own life. How ironic, is it not? The village will rejoice when I'm dead for many years, won't they Kakashi?"

"How could you think things like that Naruto? It would be a great loss to loose you and you know it! Think about it, Konoha would have been destroyed many years ago if it weren't for you! People only see what they want to see! Your father sealed the Kyuubi in hopes of the village seeing you as a hero Naruto! And you **are** a hero in my eyes!"

Naruto's eyes started cloud over as the kunai finally struck him in the heart. "I'm sorry Kakashi-sensei. But-" He started to cough up blood, spraying it all over the already blood soaked ground. His voice was growing weaker as life slowly slipped away from him, "I don't think the **(cough)** village sees me the w-way **(cough, cough)** you, I-Iruka, and granny T-Tsunade do… At least **(cough)** I'm doing K-Konoha an **(cough) **f-favour… Tell the o-other's g-good-b-bye **(cough)** for me okay? Good-bye **(cough, cough, cough)** Kakashi-sensei…"

Pulling the kunai out of himself, allowing blood to flow freely out of the open wound, his legs went limp. Naruto fell to the ground dead. The blood stained his sun kissed hair and his Jounin flat jacket crimson. Naruto was gone forever, along with the Kyuubi

A day later they had Naruto's funeral. Only Tsunade, Iruka, Hinata, Kakashi, and Jiraiya came to it. **(AN: Konohamaru was out on a mission someplace)**. That day it was raining just like at the Sandaime's funeral. The funeral lasted only a few hours, everyone said their silent prayers, before saying their final good-byes and heading home. Naruto's name was also written on the Tribute stone next to his father, the Yondaime, so people who grew to respect him could also come and say their respects. Even if it was only a few people… Most the time it was just Kakashi, Jiraiya, and Hinata who came by to pay their respects. Tsunade was always stuck in her office doing paper work, but some how she still managed to get the Tribute stone… Even if it was in the middle of the night.

**AN: well that's it. Hope you liked it. Oh Naruto didn't know Hinata cared for him, that's why he didn't mention her name and he forgot about Konohamaru, because he was so frustrated and angry. Umm… If you got any idea's for my other story (I think it called: 'Its Simply Called Love: A Kakashi and Sakura Story' Or also known as 'Sakura I love you too' I'm about halfway done the next chapter though… .) please tell me. This story is a little crappy I know… lol. Umm, if you think I can some how make this into two or three chapters please tell me. Like this could have just been a prologue. And in the next chapter something happens… Well anyways if you think it can tell me! I say 'umm' too much don't I? Like I said don't ask about the cheese toast thingy… R&R!!**

**See that little box down below there?**

**Yes that's it…**

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**Click on it…**

**Pick send a review…**

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	2. I'm So Sorry

**AN: I know it's been a year since I posted this story, but I decided to add another chapter… to make it more of a Kakashi/Naruto story. I liked your suggestions XD. But I couldn't figure out how to put them in the story and then promise to complete this story.**

**I'm sorry that Kakashi is even more OOC in this chapter. Also, there is some swearing as well.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto**

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Kakashi stood in a dark ally way as the citizens of Konoha cheered. Their laughing and singing reached his sensitive ears, putting him in an even worse mood. How could they act like that? Didn't they know how many times Naruto had saved their pitiful lives? Even though they didn't deserve his devotion?

"Come on, Kakashi! Join in the celebrations! It's been, officially, a year since the demon died. You should be happy!"

He looked up to see Kurenai standing there with Asuma. Her red eyes gleamed with joy as she watched the Copy Ninja. Kakashi glared at the lady and didn't answer. Who in the right mind would be happy about his student's death! His fists clenched into a fist at his sides, drawing blood before he released the tension. Asuma took his cigarette out of his mouth and held it in-between his fingers. He blew the smoke out of his mouth.

"Kakashi, if you don't come and join in I'll drag you out there myself."

He took a step forward to his silver haired comrade. Kakashi snarled at him, his eyes as coldas they had been during his younger years. What right did they have to make him go out there with those bastards? He spoke in his usual aloof sounding way.

"I'm not going."

Asuma grinned at him as he said,

"You're already outside. There's no point in refusing now."

He never saw the fist coming. Asuma reeled backwards and fell to the ground. The coppery taste of blood filled his mouth before he spat it out, coincidently at Kakashi's feet. He looked into Kakashi's eyes. The man had lifted up his headband to reveal his blood red Sharingan. It was spinning slowly. He wiped his mouth with his sleeve, staining it crimson. The Copy Nin looked down his nose at the chain smoking ninja and sneered.

"I don't believe you. After what he did for you, this is how you repay him? I can't think of why I ever cared for this worthless village and it's pathetic inhabitants. Selfish bastards."

Kurenai shrieked, but it went unnoticed by the crowd as they threw kunai at wooden dummies made to look like Naruto. How dare Kakashi do that to her husband! She took a step forward. Her heel clicked on the hard pavement.

"How _dare_ you Hatake Kakashi! You have no right to-"

She was cut off by Kakashi's bitter laugh. No right? No RIGHT? Who was she trying to kid? Naruto was his student! Why would he want to go and celebrate his death? What right did Asuma have to make him? He growled,

"No right? Not_ right_? You're denser than I thought, Kurenai. He had no right to force me to go out _there."_

His voice was cold and his words harsh. He breezed past them and walked into the throng of people. Fingering his kunai, hidden in his shuriken pouch, he pushed past a bunch of civilians he remembered beating Naruto when the poor boy was only six years old. Sakura was throwing kunai at images of Naruto at a booth. He growled at the sight. He should've seen that Sakura never cared about anything beyond her own selfish interests. A young girl, only six or seven, danced up to him holding an advertisement. Her blonde hair was tied up into a bun and her green eyes shined with mischief.

"Sir, would you like to play a game of…"

Her words were lost to 'Sharingan no Kakashi' as he glared at her, effectively silencing the girl. He walked past her and nearly stopped dead in his tracks as he spotted Tsunade, of all people, join in the festivities. Her sombre, brown eyes caught his, showing how little she wanted to be there. He sneered and headed out of the main plaza of Konoha. He wanted to slaughter all of those people partying. How… how did Naruto live through this for so long? Why hadn't he snapped earlier? He kicked a rock out of his path, sending it clattering on the ground a few feet away from him.

The bright lights slowly faded away as he came to the secluded area where the memorial stone rested. Crouching, he traced Naruto's name on the stone. It was still rough and sharp, as it hadn't been worn smooth by the weather yet. The stone cut his finger causing him to bleed. His blood fell to the ground with a soft _'plit.' _Ignoring his wound, he stood up and rested a hand on the top of the stone as he looked up at the night sky. The stars twinkled sadly at him up in the dark blanket they rested in.

"I'm sorry… Naruto… I'm sorry I hadn't been there for you when you needed me most… I was a horrible sensei wasn't I? I treated you no better than Sakura or one of your attackers… at least I did, until it was too late."

His gloved hand slammed into the rock. The dull ache didn't bother the lone ninja at all. A sparkling tear slid off his masked face and hit the smooth surface of the memorial stone.

"I should have realised sooner what was happening! I shouldn't have been so blind to how you were truly feeling inside, Naruto! Heh, I'm pathetic. Two years too late I was. I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive myself… Nor do I think your father and yourself will either. I guess I deserve it though. I've always been a failure… just unlike you I never corrected my mistakes… I never tried to help you when I saw you needed it most. I focused on Uchiha… I wanted him to become my prodigy student, when it was you who held the most potential, with your ability to see past a person's exterior and see what they were truly like. I owe you, Naruto… I really do…"

He stood there for a moment with his Sharingan tightly shut, silently apologizing to his old Genin team and his student, before he took a step backwards from the stone. He must have stood out there for hours, staring blankly ahead. How could his friends just betray him like that? Naruto hadn't done anything wrong! It wasn't like it was his fault his father sealed the god damned Kyuubi in him, but no, they have to turn on him anyways. The most shocking thing had been when Shikamaru, the lazy genius, turned against the poor Jinchuuriki. The boy used to be so level headed and would always think things through before he made a decision, but the boy didn't that time… Probably the worst mistake the Nara would ever make in his whole life.

His finger had scabbed over now that he looked at it. The red cut stood out against his pale skin. He found himself contemplating about Naruto's life and why he had committed suicide in such a painful way. He still remembered the boy holding the glinting kunai in his firm grip, holding it at chest level. He remembered the blood and the death, his own sadness as well, but what stood out most was his pink haired student, Sakura. She had sneered and laughed at the blonde when he finally died, even going so far to kick his corpse. Of course, he had dealt with her, quite harshly too. Still, it didn't do anything to change her poor opinion of Naruto.

But one of these days…

She might regret her actions.

He doubted it though.

Someone walked up to the stone, their presence somewhat calming. He turned to look at the shy heiress as she put down a bunch of white flowers down onto the ground. She looked so sad staring at the memorial stone, her hair shining purple in the moonlight. Her delicate fingers lingered on the cool surface of the stone as she turned to smile sadly at him.

"I loved him you know…"

He smiled sadly at the young Chuunin as she left the grounds as silently as she had come. He had loved the blonde as well... much more than he should have.Why did he have to die, a small part of his mind wandered. He silently answered himself,

"Because it was his time."

He sighed into the wind. Giving one last glance at the stone, he started to leave, pulling his headband over his left eye.

_I'm so sorry that I didn't try harder…_

_I really am._

_I'm pathetic aren't I?_

_I'll never be able to forgive myself…_

_I'm just like the rest of them…_

_Bastards…_

_I hope you went to someplace better than Konoha…_

_I really do._

_You deserved so much better._

_You should've had a wife and three children to look after… _

_Maybe even grandchildren._

_Heh, that would've been a sight to see._

He disappeared in wisps of odourless smoke, never to be seen again in Fire Country. Wind blew away the smoke and continued to blow over the land in silent mourning.

_I'm so sorry I wasn't there when you needed me most…_

_I'm so sorry._

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AN: Well, was it acceptable? Lol. Sorry that the ending was repetitive… It's been a LONG time since I've written anything angsty.


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